Sunday, May 24, 2009

Intellectual Ball and Cheney

True Story: the police officer assigned to patrol my high school was named Officer Richard Head. Needless to say, being bestowed with a phallic insinuation as a name is not the best way to win the respect of teenage boys. His badge and gun were about the only thing protecting him from a lifetime of wedgies and swirlies.

This sophomoric treatment of Officer Head can explain, at least in part, the hatred and loathing American-liberals hold for former Vice President Dick Cheney. They just can't respect the opinions of a man whose name induces more sniggers, chuckles and guffahs than Ima Hogg.

Beyond his name, what reason is there, really, to hate Dick Cheney? I'm not saying he is on my Christmas card list, but what reason was given before anointing him Public Enemy Number One? Based on the way he is treated in the public and in the media at large, you would think Dick Cheney marinates his steak with dead puppies.

Consider what Maureen Dowd, New York Times Columnist and Plagiarist-at-large, recently wrote about the former Vice President:

"He left our ports unsecured, our food supply unsafe, the Taliban rising and Osama on the loose. No matter if or when terrorists attack here — and they're on their own timetable, not a partisan red/blue state timetable — Cheney will be deemed the primary one who made America more vulnerable."

The fact that such a specious, illogical rant could make its way onto the pages of the New York Times proves that Maureen Dowd is not the only one suffering from acute intellectual deficiency. In the school of ideas, Mrs. Dowd and her ilk clearly ride the short bus.

Blaming Dick Cheney for any and all future terrorist attacks is like blaming global warming on the Thundercats. There is simple no rational justification for such a broad accusation. Using that same logic, can we blame the Oklahoma City Bombing on Dan Quayle? Additionally, how is ferreting Osama Bin Laden out of a hole while at the same time assuring that no one spits in your Big Mac the responsibility of the Vice President?

The Vice President has one job: Don't die. That's it. His responsibility is to live in case the President doesn't. There is no more emasculated and neutered political position in the United States government. One former Vice President famously said that the office "was not worth a bucket of warm piss."

Dick Cheney never wrote, voted on or debated legislation. His only votes came as a tie breaker. He passed no executive order, commanded no troops and issued no official policy. Dick Cheney had less power and influence than the First Lady, yet we are supposed to believe that all past, present and future terrorist attacks are his fault.

Sadly enough, the Obama administration is applying the same twisted, baseless reasoning that turned Dick Cheney into a villain to its own national security policy. Say what you want about the Bush administration policies on the war on terror, they worked. For almost eight years we have not had a single significant attack on the US homeland or any of her over seas assets. Despite this success, Barack Obama, in the height of arrogance, is hoping to get the same or better results by doing less. He is betting that a pre-9-11 national security policy will have post 9-11 results. He is wrong.

Luckily, the same Dick Cheney whom the liberals so despise, has taken time away from crushing rainbows and oppressing widows, to publicly point out the numerous flaws in Obama's myopic national security policy. By simply opening his mouth, he has the entire Democratic establishment back stepping faster than bar full of line- dancing cowboys.

Consider all that has happened since Dick Cheney started to issue a voice of warning only a few weeks ago. On two key issues of national security, military tribunals and the release of the water boarding photos, Dick Cheney has played a part in getting Barack Obama to completely, and pathetically reverse himself.

He has gotten Barack Obama's own intelligence appointees to reveal the fact that waterboarding helped prevent a 9-11 type of attack on Los Angeles thereby saving countless thousands of lives.

By keeping the focus on the use of enhanced interrogation techniques, he has managed to catch Nancy Pelosi in a blatant and all-too-public lie. There is even now murmuring that she might be forced to resign because of her I-didn't-know-then-I-did-know-then-I-was-lied-to-then-I-was-briefed-but-I-wasn't-fully-briefed web of deception.

The attention Dick Cheney has brought to the declassified memos also shows that Barack Obama released these memos against the advice of his own intelligence officials and every intelligence official who preceded them. Dick Cheney has continually asked that the information gleaned from enhanced interrogation be released to the public. The fact that President Obama has been so reluctant to do so shows his fear that the court of public opinion will decide that the answers we got from our interrogations were worth whatever methods we used to ask the question.

Additionally, on the issue of Gitmo, Barack Obama is now facing push back from his own party who voted 90-6 to refuse funding for the closure of the prison. Mysteriously, the national media has even begun to recognize Dick Cheney's credibility on the issue of national security as shown by their willingness to televise his live rebuttal to Barack Obama's security speech offered in the National Archives.

In a world drowning in a cacophony of opinion from all sides, Dick Cheney is emerging as an inconvenient, powerful and articulate voice. As conservative talk show host Hugh Hewitt stated "Cheney scares the appeasers of the new millennium, even as Churchill scared the appeasers of the '30s, and for the same reason. Cheney knows the enemy, and he knows the new government isn't taking that enemy seriously… Every time he speaks, millions will listen closely as hundreds within the Beltway scowl." Sorry President Obama, but when people (even conservative talk show hosts) stop comparing Dick Cheney to Darth Vader and start comparing him to Winston Churchill, you've got problems.

Recent polling also shows public opinion of Dick Cheney is starting to improve. In fact, after Dick Cheney's rebuttal, an informal poll on MSNBC found that 61% of the voters agreed with his viewpoint on national security while only 31% agreed with Obama . Now if this were a Fox News poll, it would not be worth a pitcher of warm anything. The fact that is comes from MSNBC, whose litany of liberal talking heads still could not convince a majority of its listeners that Obama is right, is very telling.

For the Obama Administration, Dick Cheney is suddenly becoming an intellectual ball and chain, keeping their flights into fantasy and fiction firmly grounded in reality. Dick Cheney doesn't need a badge and gun to protect himself from Beltway Bullies. He just needs that truth.


Rachel said...

He also occasionally shoots his friends in the face. That's my favorite thing about him.

And everyone (except maybe Sarah Palin) knows exactly what the VP's job is: to enquire daily about the health of the president.
Although, if the VP truly is useless, why did your party launch so many anti-Biden attacks? (aside from the fear that something will happen to the president)

The Average Joel said...

First: I am a registered independent.The GOP has made it very clear that it views Mormons the way a hiker views a Sherpa. We are useful for carrying the load, but when it comes time to actually making decisions on the direction of the Party, we are asked to sit quietly back while while the big man with the map makes all the decisions for us. As long as Mike Huckabee is a Republican, I will where an (I) next to my name with pride.

Second, I think most of the animus aimed at Joe Biden was because he was such an easy target, much like Palin. The man has never found a foot he did not deem worthy of shoving into his mouth.

Rachel said...

Well, it makes me happy that you are a registered independent, but how do you actually vote? :)