The following post is in response to a comment posted by Boymystere on my West Coast GayKK blog posted earlier this week. His comment was so respectful and well-thought out, I felt it deserved an equally respectful and well thought out response. But since this is me we are talking about here, you are pretty much stuck with whatever comes out.
Boymystere- First, thank you for your open and honest response. This is the type of dialogue that is so greatly needed to maintain the free market of ideas our democracy is based on. Dissenting opinions are always welcome and I appreciate you taking the time. I hope you will indulge a response on my part.
Allow me to offer you a metaphor that I think will help explain why I support Proposition 8. I consider myself a well educated man. I have a Master's Degree from one of the nation's best schools. However, there are a large number of people who are not able to get a Master's Degree; some because they don't want it, others because they simply lack the ability. Sadly enough, there are far more people who want a Master's Degree than can actually get one.
Now, imagine if my school, in order to correct this perceived inequality, started handing out Master's Degrees to anyone who wanted one. A Master's Degree, at the end of the day, is only a slip of paper. Its value comes from what it represents: education, intelligence and hard work. When it no longer takes education, intelligence and hard work to obtain a Master's Degree, than its value becomes less then the piece of paper it is printed on. Handing out degrees based on desire, not achievement, does nothing to help those who want one and everything to hurt those who earned one. When everyone can have a Master's Degree, no one can. (Side note: This reminds me of Hank's response to a Christian Rock Band on King of the Hill: "They are not making Christianity better; they are just making rock and roll worse".)
Gay Marriage will never disrupt the relationship I have with my wife and the loving home we have tried to create for our children just like handing out Master's Degrees like party favors will never rob me of the education I achieved in earning one. What it will do is rob from my marriage the meaning that makes it so valuable. Marriage is the institution created by society to give children the best possible chance at success. When marriage loses meaning, it will be abandoned all together. When this happens, we rob from our children the commitment between a Mother and Father they need to have the best chance at success.
You may call this paranoia on my part, but sadly I have seen the consequences of the devaluation of marriage with my own eyes. I lived for an extended period of time in a country where marriage was virtually non-existent. This was due to the draconian laws of that country which made marriage virtually impossible. The result of this marriage-less society was family after family of fatherless children. With no social pressure or reward for fathers to stick around, very few of them did. Now, a whole generation of fatherless children is almost ensured a lifetime of poverty, crime and ignorance. Don't believe me? In this country I once met a single mom who became a grandmother at the ripe old age of 28. That is three generations right there suffering from a marriage deficient society. Even in our own country, we see that demographic groups which do not value marriage suffer from the same or similar problems I saw across the pond. No government, religious or academic program has ever been able to duplicate even a portion of the success that we see when Mom and Dad are married.
Even if California law were changed and homosexuals were allowed to marry, they would never have a marriage in the true sense of the word. When two men are allowed to obtain a marriage certificate, in that moment, all they and anyone else will really be getting is a piece of paper.